Shinobi Epic Rap Battles
by Eddy LP
Summary: ...Rated M for language...


This is what garbage was left in my mind at the end of today... =D

It came from watching 'Epic Rap Battles of History' on Youtube

Disclaimer: I D O N O T O W N N A R U T O . . .

Have fun!

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...

* * *

The Screen flashes through several names, ending in:

Yamanaka Ino VS Hyuuga Hinata

Both go to the middle of the circle of people...

Ino scoffs while looking at Hinata, and starts:

"Well if it isn't the shy little Hyuuga **girl**;"

"heir to the throne of the albine-eyed **schmucks**."

"Your moves are only good for making some ice-cream-**swirl**;"

"here, fill me this cone, you can have 4-**bucks**."

Hinata slaps the cone off of Ino's hand, and responds:

"Silence blondie, let me teach you a word **collection**."

"Your rap is like your mouth, big but lacking **expression**."

"Your eyes are **blue**, but I can see right through **you**."

"Every time you flaunt **about**, loser's eyes follow you **around**;"

"while I'm busy working-**out**, sweating on my training **ground**."

"My skill surpasses **yours**!"

"It's like comparing tha light we see, from the Sun and **stars**…"

Ino grits her teeth, and interrupts:

"Alright you **peasant**, I see you mean **business**;"

"I was giving you a **present**, but now you won't even have **Christmas**!"

"My flaunts distract most **enemies**, making it easy to finish them **forever**."

"To fight with those huge **titties**, you need more training than Lee and Gai **together**."

"You don't like my hair and eye **tone**? They are the same as your little **crush**."

"You're always hiding behind a **stone**; so maybe you haven't even seen him, **gosh**…"

"Is that shy attitude a game **plan**? I think your time frame is a little off **margin**."

"You'll become the head of your **clan**, not to mention a 60 year old **virgin**!"

At that remark the crowd erupted in a chorus of 'Oooh!'

Hinata closed her eyes in an attempt to stay focused and mentally drown out the voices...

She then prepared to strike back:

"Pfft! Your one to talk, you mind-reading **slut**;"

"At least I choose right, while you chased a chicken **butt**!"

The crowd erupted in 'Oooh!' again, but this time in the opposing direction, and an outraged 'Hn' was also heard from somewhere within it...

Hinata continued:

"You don't know with whom you're **messing**;"

"my brain is far above that blonde **mop**!"

"The daimyo is who I should be rap-**battling**;"

"instead of a clerk from the freakin flower **shop**!"

Ino punches in:

"That would be true _if_ you were **winning**; but right now you are just **whining**!"

The crowd edges them on...

"At least you are currently sucking at **something**; as you will never be able to do a real cock **fucking**!"

Everyone starts clapping in a rhythm...

"And now I bid you **farewell**, as you had enough of a **beating**;"

"So you better go take care of that head-**swell**; before your brain starts over-**heating**!"

Some in the crowd fell on their asses from laughing so hard

Hinata got furious at Ino, going into a rage:

"Silence Bitch! I should paralyze your speech with a strike of my **hand**;"

"but that would send you crying to your big foreheaded **friend**!" She let out without thinking...

Ino gasped. The crowd got death silent… most gulped in shock and fear, as Hinata only now realized what she said.

Everyone started backing away from one particular spot. And as Hinata gazed in that direction, she saw a flash of Pink.

The 20 year old Hyuuga thought back to the beginning of this event...

* * *

**/_\\ Flashback /_\\**

"Welcome everyone!" the sixth hokage, Uzumaki Naruto, greeted. "To the Shinobi, Epic Rap Battles!"

The crowd roared and clapped...

"I would like to call the participants down here to the center." the third tsuchikage, Onoki, called. "Matches will be chosen at random, and will appear on the screen."

"The winner of each battle," the fifth hokage, Senju Tsunade, continued. "will be chosen by voting."

"All participants and attendants can vote once per battle" the fifth kazekage, Sabaku no Gaara, explained. "And now, for the rules of engagement…"

"Any form of verbal abuse towards your current opponent, is valid." the fifth mizukage, Terumi Mei, started. "Indirect verbal abuse towards other participants is valid, but can have consequences on your popularity, which may or may not have a direct impact on the voting of each person."

"Indirect verbal abuse towards non-participants, however, may have bigger consequences." the forth raikage, Ei (A), warned. "They can, like the other previously stated, have impact on voting decisions. But, this one also targets non-participants, who wouldn't be able to strike back at a later date to defend themselves, and as such... is considered a low blow."

"And, the consequences of this low blow are..." Naruto, again, voiced, "the 'verbally injured' attendant has the option of entering the event for a special grudge match against the offender. If the offender loses the battle, he or she is disqualified, and all gains gathered so far will be transferred to the winner. In this case, the winner can choose to continue in the event, or keep the gains and go back to being an attendant. During the battle, the grudge challenger can choose to start first or second, and can interrupt at any time. The 'low blow' giver, however, cannot interrupt. As such, can only rap once per battle unless his or her opponent allows, and _when_ he or she allows... in other words, you are screwed, hehe."

"That said," Tsunade exclaimed, "The winner of each battle gains 100,000 Ryu, 1 day on a hotel of his or her choosing, 10 meals on any restaurant, and 5 shinobi supply-containers... not to mention all the gains his or her opponent may already have. The loser goes home empty-handed... Good luck!

**/_\\ Flashback End /_\\**

* * *

"Let the voting beggin!" Shikamaru, the choosen mediator for the battles, declared.

Meanwhile, Ino was looking at Sakura, having a mental talk of their own, unbeknownst to Hinata, who was mentally smacking her own face for the idiotic mistake.

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...

* * *

Well, any thoughts about this completely random brain-storm of a Fic? xD

Feel free to express who you think should win. And, if Hinata wins... should Sakura, who isn't a participant, challenge her to a grudge match?

And who would you like to see going against each other in a future Rap Battle? (The Kages don't count... yet)

Have a nice day!


End file.
